Thursday, May 10, 2012

Finding Strength

Sometimes people compliment me how amazing my strength is, but I just don't see it. Or, at least I can't take credit for it because I know I am not the source -- it is from the Lord. If you looked at all I've been through: all the chemo, radiation, surgeries, biopsies, scans, and the many varied side effects -- if you rolled them all together, then yes, they would be really overwhelming. But God has only given this trial to me in one-day doses, and He gives me strength one day at a time. Daily bread.

I wish I could say that my life has been a faithful walk, always close to the Lord, but it hasn't. Funny, when I read the Old Testament about the Israelites and how they seemed to go through cycles of walking close to the Lord then straying then coming back again -- I think, what's wrong with those people? Don't they ever learn? What knuckleheads! They should learn from experience how much more blessed their lives would be if they would just STAY close to the Lord.

Then I look at my own life and see it has been the same cycles. When everything is going smoothly in my life, I may go days or even weeks without spending time in prayer or reading my Bible. Everything's fine -- I can handle it, right? Then a problem comes into my life -- a sickness, job loss, death in the family, etc. -- that drives me back to the Lord. What a knucklehead! You'd think I would learn from experience!

Jesus taught us we should pray for "daily bread." I used to think this was just asking God to provide us with food for the day, but we should be looking to Him daily for nourishment and strength emotionally and spiritually as well.

I love the story in Exodus 16 (Exodus 16) in which God provides daily food for the Israelites. Every day (except the Sabbath) for the 40 years they were in the wilderness. What an amazing lesson in God's faithfulness and provision. It also reminds me not to multiply my suffering by worrying or borrowing trouble from the future, but to trust God one day at a time! He is my strength and my daily bread!

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